"I do!"
Those two words form the longest sentence in the English vocabulary. Quite frankly, it is a life sentence. If you are not married, you probably have a list of golden traits you desire to see in the person you get married to before you say "I do!" You obviously don't want to commit yourself for life to someone with undesirable qualities.
Well I'd hate to burst your bubble but... You remember that happy couple who recently came from their honeymoon? How happy they seemed as they testified of how great marriage life is? Well it was not an entirely true testimony! They exaggerated. Truth be told, marriage is great! I am not married but I know God wouldn't author anything that is not good. That is how I know that it is a good thing.
I have always been painfully honest. Some like that about me and some choose to give me a pretty wide social berth for that trait. I don't know how to call a spade a big spoon? I am offended by the very thought that one would call it so. I have often-times tried to call the toilets wash-rooms and conveniences while seeking direction but I find that most people just don't understand me so I resort to calling them as they are, "toilets!" Well, everybody knows where the toilets are when you call them that way!
So allow me to state the issues as they are without too many decorations. Regardless of how clean a toilet is, no one will eat from there. There is no perfect marriage! The Bible itself says that he who gets married will have many troubles.
New International Version
But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this. 1 Corinthians 7:28
So what are those troubles? It is only after you get married that you realise how the phrase, "love is blind" conned you. Marriage is a real eye-opener. It helps you see all those annoying habits of the guy/girl who just a few days ago seemed so perfect. What, with the wedding preparations you start seeing his/her anger side but you dismiss it as the stress of preparations. In marriage the curtains drop and they never go up again. Be very careful when you unveil her, you may not like what you see.
Married people will tell you how great marriage is. It is like they attend some training where they are all taught how to say the same thing. I call it the marriage motto, “Oh it's great! Sure we have our challenges but it's great!" Boy, you wish they elaborated on those challenges. It is the small foxes that spoil the vine
Song of Solomon 2:15NKJV
Catch us the foxes,
The little foxes that spoil the vines,
For our vines have tender grapes.
You see, small things like pressing the toothpaste from the centre of the tube, leaving the toilet seat up, the hair that gets stuck in the comb, the little white spots in the mirror, locking the door, the remote control, the volume of prayer and so on and so forth can really spoil the vine. But they don't tell you that they suffer from the disease of leaving socks in the living room until you sign the little dotted lines on the marriage certificate. In fact, as you say you do, you have no idea what you are doing. It is much later that you ask yourself, "What did I do?"
So naturally, it goes without saying that you would have a list of qualifications, the size of the Bible, before you say those two words that trap you for life.
Now, as you move along you realise that very few can meet ten out of your million desired traits and you start lowering your expectations as the clock ticks and your mates keep getting married. Of course you meet them in the shopping mall and they look so happy (for the cameras) and you wonder why you can't find a nice guy/girl like them.
The problem isn't in making the list! The problem is how you do the shopping! Most people will take the list and start checking and crossing out the traits as they check out. That is the first category that hosts the vast majority. The second category will start praying for a guy/girl that fits the traits.
There is a third option that most people are not even aware of. It is exactly why I wrote this article. To tell you the third option.
You see, you are created in the image and likeness of the creator. That means you can create! You can create a guy/girl that fits your description of a spouse. How? I am glad you asked.
A model prayer for spouse looks more or less like this, " Dear Lord I pray that you will give me a God-fearing, caring, loving, understanding, intelligent, handsome blah blah blah..." Then after the prayer you sit out on the lawn and start comparing the guys with the list and discover...
The handsome aren't caring, the caring aren't handsome, the intelligent aren't understanding, the beautiful aren't submissive, the prayerful aren't exactly miss universe and so on and so forth...
So what happens? You either lower you standards or grow a white moustache (or hit menopause) waiting. That is, if you were not blessed enough to read this article. In this article I tell you of option number 3.
Okay, I am guilty of creating suspense so let me just cut to the chase. Option 3 is to start creating that girl in your prayers. The Bible says that there is life and death in the power of your tongue and that you shall declare a thing and it shall be established. Job 22:28. So start decreeing!
Here is an example...
"Dear Lord I know that you have created a special person for me. I also know that there is no one who is perfect. I know I have a lot of junk to work on and that special someone probably does too. I ask you for grace to work on my own shortcomings. I also ask that you will create in him/her an understanding heart. I pray that you will cause the fear of you to come upon him/her..." and so on and so forth
Hold out that list and begin to create that person out in prayer attribute after the other as you work out the same qualities in your own life. For crying out loud, there is no requirement to close your eyes as you pray! So, hold the list and read as you pray for God to create each virtue in that wreck of a man/woman who will eventually become your spouse. In your own six days (that it took God to create) you will come up with that desirable man/woman.
You want a patient man/ woman? Create one. You want a faithful husband? He is in your tongue! You want a submissive wife? She is in Your Tongue!
Practice this and give me your feedback.
Please click on the advertisement below to see my NEW website. I will be posting blog posts there.
Also see the video on the top left.
Minister Felix Joe,
Those two words form the longest sentence in the English vocabulary. Quite frankly, it is a life sentence. If you are not married, you probably have a list of golden traits you desire to see in the person you get married to before you say "I do!" You obviously don't want to commit yourself for life to someone with undesirable qualities.
Well I'd hate to burst your bubble but... You remember that happy couple who recently came from their honeymoon? How happy they seemed as they testified of how great marriage life is? Well it was not an entirely true testimony! They exaggerated. Truth be told, marriage is great! I am not married but I know God wouldn't author anything that is not good. That is how I know that it is a good thing.
I have always been painfully honest. Some like that about me and some choose to give me a pretty wide social berth for that trait. I don't know how to call a spade a big spoon? I am offended by the very thought that one would call it so. I have often-times tried to call the toilets wash-rooms and conveniences while seeking direction but I find that most people just don't understand me so I resort to calling them as they are, "toilets!" Well, everybody knows where the toilets are when you call them that way!
So allow me to state the issues as they are without too many decorations. Regardless of how clean a toilet is, no one will eat from there. There is no perfect marriage! The Bible itself says that he who gets married will have many troubles.
New International Version
But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this. 1 Corinthians 7:28
So what are those troubles? It is only after you get married that you realise how the phrase, "love is blind" conned you. Marriage is a real eye-opener. It helps you see all those annoying habits of the guy/girl who just a few days ago seemed so perfect. What, with the wedding preparations you start seeing his/her anger side but you dismiss it as the stress of preparations. In marriage the curtains drop and they never go up again. Be very careful when you unveil her, you may not like what you see.
Married people will tell you how great marriage is. It is like they attend some training where they are all taught how to say the same thing. I call it the marriage motto, “Oh it's great! Sure we have our challenges but it's great!" Boy, you wish they elaborated on those challenges. It is the small foxes that spoil the vine
Song of Solomon 2:15NKJV
Catch us the foxes,
The little foxes that spoil the vines,
For our vines have tender grapes.
You see, small things like pressing the toothpaste from the centre of the tube, leaving the toilet seat up, the hair that gets stuck in the comb, the little white spots in the mirror, locking the door, the remote control, the volume of prayer and so on and so forth can really spoil the vine. But they don't tell you that they suffer from the disease of leaving socks in the living room until you sign the little dotted lines on the marriage certificate. In fact, as you say you do, you have no idea what you are doing. It is much later that you ask yourself, "What did I do?"
So naturally, it goes without saying that you would have a list of qualifications, the size of the Bible, before you say those two words that trap you for life.
Now, as you move along you realise that very few can meet ten out of your million desired traits and you start lowering your expectations as the clock ticks and your mates keep getting married. Of course you meet them in the shopping mall and they look so happy (for the cameras) and you wonder why you can't find a nice guy/girl like them.
The problem isn't in making the list! The problem is how you do the shopping! Most people will take the list and start checking and crossing out the traits as they check out. That is the first category that hosts the vast majority. The second category will start praying for a guy/girl that fits the traits.
There is a third option that most people are not even aware of. It is exactly why I wrote this article. To tell you the third option.
You see, you are created in the image and likeness of the creator. That means you can create! You can create a guy/girl that fits your description of a spouse. How? I am glad you asked.
A model prayer for spouse looks more or less like this, " Dear Lord I pray that you will give me a God-fearing, caring, loving, understanding, intelligent, handsome blah blah blah..." Then after the prayer you sit out on the lawn and start comparing the guys with the list and discover...
The handsome aren't caring, the caring aren't handsome, the intelligent aren't understanding, the beautiful aren't submissive, the prayerful aren't exactly miss universe and so on and so forth...
So what happens? You either lower you standards or grow a white moustache (or hit menopause) waiting. That is, if you were not blessed enough to read this article. In this article I tell you of option number 3.
Okay, I am guilty of creating suspense so let me just cut to the chase. Option 3 is to start creating that girl in your prayers. The Bible says that there is life and death in the power of your tongue and that you shall declare a thing and it shall be established. Job 22:28. So start decreeing!
Here is an example...
"Dear Lord I know that you have created a special person for me. I also know that there is no one who is perfect. I know I have a lot of junk to work on and that special someone probably does too. I ask you for grace to work on my own shortcomings. I also ask that you will create in him/her an understanding heart. I pray that you will cause the fear of you to come upon him/her..." and so on and so forth
Hold out that list and begin to create that person out in prayer attribute after the other as you work out the same qualities in your own life. For crying out loud, there is no requirement to close your eyes as you pray! So, hold the list and read as you pray for God to create each virtue in that wreck of a man/woman who will eventually become your spouse. In your own six days (that it took God to create) you will come up with that desirable man/woman.
You want a patient man/ woman? Create one. You want a faithful husband? He is in your tongue! You want a submissive wife? She is in Your Tongue!
Practice this and give me your feedback.
Please click on the advertisement below to see my NEW website. I will be posting blog posts there.
Also see the video on the top left.
Minister Felix Joe,
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